I previously blogged about values and principles. This blog was an attempt to understand them and the differences between them.
Principles of living are so strong that they create the paradigm from which we view the world, view life. We live within our own set of principals subconsciously as we believe that that is the ONLY way one should live.
But when we look at our own, and see that others do not live by the same. Are we right to be upset with them?
You don’t have to agree with another persons principals of living, but understanding them, and accepting them as theirs, will make the world a better place for all parties.
Our principals create our paradigms. That is the way we see the world. They are subconcious rule books of right and wrong. They can be learned, over time, but by adult life, most of us have our principals so deeply ingrained that our paradigm, or world view of ‘shoulds and musts’, are set.
However, we cannot ignore the fact that our view of the world is not the world. It’s just our view. Just like a map Is not the territory, it is just a representation of it.
I heard a story the other day which finely displays a paradigm shift…….
‘‘I saw a man was on a crowded train, and his two kids were running riot. The man loooked unkempt and unninterested. The kids were shouting and screaming and bumping into other passengers whilst running around on the train.
The man looked completely oblivious to the kids running around and didn’t look like he was going to reprimand or reign the children in anytime soon.
Finally one of the kids stood on my toe, and so I approached the man and said ‘excuse me sir, are you going to do anything about your children!?’
The man snapped out of the trance he was in and looked at me sorrowfully and said, ‘oh, I do apologise, we’ve just left the hospital where their mother has just died and I don’t have the words to explain it to them, you’re right though, i’ll Calm them down’.
I immediately felt my world change’’
Powerful shifts in ‘truths’ about the world are usually pivotal and profound.
For 20 years I have viewed the world through alcoholic eyes. I have never seen the world, as it is. I have and always will see the world as I am.
Now seeing the world through sober eyes, it’s a different place. It’s harsher, more brutal, more raw, more beautiful, more vivid. For now anyway. I’m still shifting perspective and readjusting to it.
Its like switching from an old black and white TV to a HD flatscreen.
Rather than distinguishing emotions as, feelin good, or bad. I understand the subtle differences between pride and joy, annoyance and anger.
The danger for me now at the minute is that i’m Stuck in between the two paradigms . I still feel part of the old alcoholic world. And haven’t fully stepped into the sober world.
And im not sure if, how and when that transition will ever happen. It’s like being in purgatory. A world of torment.
But it’s a brave new world and I guess I just have to keep taking it a day at a time and not look too far ahead. At least that’s the paradigm I’m operating from for the moment.
Onwards and upwards