So the question is, can I still call this blog ‘Matts beerfreeyear!?’
As I mentioned in my previous blog, I have a new paradigm now. I am practicing moderation. I feel good about it. I feel freer than before I started the year, and freer than the last few months.
My urge to drink Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday has diminished. And when the urges do come, I can control them. I can look at it in a new empowering light. And I can decide wether I want to drink alcohol, rather than to fall victim to its every calling.
I feel like i’ve Joined the realm of the ‘normal drinkers’.
I will continue to minimise it, to make it small. In a way by committing to a year off, as the year went on, I was giving alcohol so much focus than it was a growing beast. The beast is not a beast anymore. It is but a tame puppy now, very manageable.
I need to be conscious of its capacity to grow. I am conscious of it. And that is a wonderful thing, because with that consciousness, I feel I can keep a lid on it.
So i’m Pondering the question, can I still call this blog my beerfreeyear??
My conclusion is that I can.
The original intention was to change ‘the way that I drank’ , the vehicle was a year free of beer. Well, I’m allowing myself to change what that means to me.
I’m freeing myself of being imprisoned by alcohol, as I was in the past. I now am exercising control over alcohol in a way that I never have in my life.
And my intention is that this is not only for the year, but for the rest of my life.
Some people may not agree with that. They may say i’m Just finding excuses or i’m Just changing the meaning to suit. That’s fine, each person can hold their own opinions. But i’ve Found my peace with it.
And i’m Living in my own integrity. . . .
I needed the abstinence to give me the perspective, and practice controlling my urges. The timescale has become irrelevant.
So the blog title is staying. At least till the end of the year 🙂